The loss of a loved one is especially difficult at this time of year, especially if this is the first Christmas without them. While everyone else is seemingly enjoying the festivities, the sense of loss that those of us left behind feel can be overwhelming at times. I have found that there is one thought that can help us to deal with the sense of loss that accompanies the holiday season for many of us. It’s quite simple really; everyone has lost someone at sometime in their lives.
Surviving family members and friends are not alone in this situation and, unfortunately, their situation is not unique. I believe the secret to dealing with grief lies in time itself. While we will always miss loved ones that have passed on it does indeed become more tolerable in time. I also believe that we should never spend too much time dwelling on the past and thinking about the “what if’s” or the “why’s”. Instead we should remember the good times and be thankful that we were able to share even the smallest portion of our lives with such a wonderful and special person.
It’s important to remember that the time we spend grieving is time that we are not spending with loved ones that are still with us. Is that the right thing to do? Grief is a relentless enemy but it is not undefeatable. I have decided that now is as good a time as any to let it go. Although I will never be able to replace a single person that I have lost in this lifetime, I also can never replace the ones that are still here with me today.
It has been said that tomorrow is promised to no one and I have learned how true that simple statement really is. But I am here now and so are many others that I love and cherish just as much as the ones that have moved on without me. The time has come to enjoy what I do have and stop wishing for what can never be. Yes, tomorrow is promised to no one but this is today and I intend to make the most of it. You can do the same.